I clicked on Home Sanctuary this morning to find this very appropriate post from Rachel Anne.
I love margins, in my writing, in my house, in my life. When those margins get squeezed out, I get squeezed out. It's not pretty. Ask my husband, my kids, my friends, my family.
I NEED margins. Without the; my thoughts, my words, my actions tumble all over the place, with no concern for where they land or who they hurt.
Margins help us to see clearly, breathe deeply, live fully, focus completely.
This morning I didn't have my much-needed margin before the rest of the house was up and about. My family felt the aftershocks. It's wasn't pretty. In fact, it was downright ugly. I was the cartoonish cranky mom, complete with disheveled hair and mismatched pj's. I needed caffeine. I needed some time to wake up, already. I needed my margin.
The really sad part in all this is that it was my own doing. I didn't set my alarm last night (still have no clue why). So, when my husband popped out of bed and told me the time (about an hour past my usual time), it set my brain spiraling. I was immediately consumed with getting up and getting the children out the door on time, hopefully with something resembling breakfast before they left. The never-ending to-do list flooded my mind and began to torment me with thoughts of failure, irresponsibility. Good times.
This is the third day since Monday that my day has not gone according to plan. God is trying to tell me something and I'm clearly not listening, not understanding. For the sake of my family and my own sanity, I need to understand this.
Open my ears, Lord. Help me hear and understand Your voice. My life is nothing more than a cranky, ugly mess without You. I want the life You have for me, a life with margin and focus and beauty. A life that glorifies You. A life that follows Your plan for me. Show me that plan and give me the courage to follow You.